Digested week: My resolution, for the world, is sunken living rooms

Digested week: My resolution, for the world, is sunken living rooms - They’re cosy, civilised and different without disturbing things too much. Let’s do this!At last. I have been waiting a year for this moment. I must apologise to you all. Twelve months ago, in this very organ, nay in this very diary, I noted that we were now in the hazy, lazy, crazy days between Boxing Day and new year and thus wished you all a happy “Christmas perineum”. It should have been, of course, “Merryneum”. It has been bothering me ever since. I can only put it down to post-turkey malaise. If it helps, it is only while Googling around this subject to write this entry that I have realised that the nickname “taint” – for the fleshly rather than festive part under – refers to the fact that “’t ain’t the front, ’t ain’t the back”. I think perhaps I knew this at some level but hadn’t consciously made the connection. Anyway. I offer the knowledge to you here in some kind of twisted act of contrition. ...